Stress, stress and the 14% battery right before leaving your house for work. We all deal with it, well enough or not. Good or bad, an effect takes place, in retrospect. As much as we would like to sit on a shaded chair at a beach, with sunset at a pause, its impractical. Peace never exists without the triumph over chaos. Chaos is the reference used to define peace. You sitting on that beach, a week at most and sooner or later you’ll turn into the crazy old man you loathe to be. The acknowledgment of life’s troubles, raises the question on how they are to be solved.
Prior to giving an examination, I had a friend to whom I had good connection with. We talked about anything that would come up, personal or academic, sports, life, could’ve been anything. Now, both of us were having our own exams and we decided to talk and meet up after our then hectic schedule was cleared up. After 2 months we had a bit of a chat and for some reason the space of our connection seemed void. We had time, but we still didn’t talk for months together. By some luck, we saw each other again in a class and talked a bit daily. I left the place and some weeks had passed when I tried to ring up the person’s phone. No answer. I tried again after a couple of days, still nothing, those days turned to weeks and months.
A day after the new year (yes, it had been that long) I rung up again and decided to delete the number if it didn’t reach. You bet it did, we both were appalled by the sudden call, the other side didn’t even recognize my voice at first. We talked for a couple of hours and it was dropped after a postpone of our conversation to the next day. The next day I waited, I didn’t want to be a nudge in someone’s day by calling myself. I got a bit upset, I waited for couple of more days and yeah, then weeks. I lost hope that we would ever be friends again and I thought maybe I did something to upset the person. Maybe I shouldn’t have called in the first place, maybe a back door exit was what someone was trying to find. I blamed myself and accepted the reality.
I didn’t try to communicate, I just accepted the void. I had other friends, thankfully not the the typical drink buddies, but one’s that can hold even in the tides of atrocities. Recently, I found that a new name with a familiar face as the display picture had popped up in my WhatsApp. I was excited, but sad at the same time. I didn’t know what to do, should I text, or let things be. It was a conundrum I just took as rain drops to take shelter from. After sometime, I don’t know what happened to me, I just sent a text, out of the blue. And there it was, a jolly and excited reply. And since then we are in regular touch.
Why did I share this personal story? Turned out, that the person’s grandparent had died and some more unfortunate events had taken place. You never know what’s going on in someone’s life, maybe not even the reason for their distance or clasp. I learned it the hard way.
There is a Buddhist story in which a hunter is angry and raged about a monkey who keeps on stealing his belongings. He had been trying to catch him for so long but still, nothing came through. An old man comes to him and tells him to stuff a coconut with some delicacies and leave it outside, the hunter follows the advice. He wakes up the next day witnessing the monkey chaotically running in circles with the coconut stuck on his hand.
The poor thing doesn’t realize that all it has to do is let go of the stuffing and the hand will be free. It tries to have everything whilst being unknown of its doomed fate. Interesting enough is the fact that hunters still use this technique to catch monkeys.
“Some of us think holding on makes us strong, but sometimes it is letting go.” – Herman Hesse